Monday, July 17, 2006

How does Brisbane compare?

Being a relocatee, as many people in Brissie seem to be, I thought it would only be fair to allow the places we leave a fair chance to go head-to-head with the River City. I present the inaugural (and possibly only) Brisvegas vs Somewhere Else challenge.

Today we have: Brisbane vs Canberra

Playoffs

* Lake Burley-Griffin vs Brisbane River
The Brisbane River snakes through the heart of Brisbane and looks very purty with the moon rising over it. Lake Burley-Griffin is a glorified puddle full of shopping trolleys and blue-green algae.

Verdict: Upset win by Lake Burley-Griffin in a last-minute penalty shootout following a dodgy call from the ref!


* The Valley vs Garema Place
The Valley has the Zoo, the Rev, Ric's, the Troubadour, the Arena - and that's just for live music.
Garema Place has the Phoenix, and used to have the Gypsy. And those sheep sculptures and the giant cushion.

Verdict: Was it ever in question?


* City vs Mooseheads
The City is full of over-priced pubs and people that want to be seen drinking in over-priced pubs.
Mooseheads is full of ADFA meatheads.

Verdict: A headbutt from a reservist knocks the City out of the game!


* Brisbane winter mornings vs Canberra winter mornings
Brisbane winter mornings: low of 12 degrees, sometimes you need to wear a jacket.
Canberra winter mornings: low of minus 5 degrees, sometimes you can't feel your feet.

Verdict: Scraping ice off the windscreen is for crazy people. Brisvegas all the way.


Semi-final

Lake Burley-Griffin vs the Valley
Lake Burley-Griffin adds some semblance of character to a relatively characterless city and provides something to put bridges over and for people to walk around. In summer, it can be a bit on the nose.
The Valley has markets, Chinatown, buskers and people all over the place on any weekend night and most weeknights. In summer, it can be a bit on the nose.

Verdict: In another controversial decision the Lake scrapes through.


Mooseheads vs Brisbane winter mornings
Mooseheads burnt down without any noticeable difference to the Canberra "scene", and its reopening was heralded by Duntroon boys as a return to heady days of drinking til you can't stand up and pawing girls on the dancefloor.
Brisbane winter mornings: low of 12 degrees, sometimes you need to wear a jacket.

Verdict: Brisbane's strategy is not original, but clearly a winner.


Final
Lake Burley-Griffin vs Brisbane winter mornings
If the wind is blowing the wrong way when Captain Cook's jet goes off and you are driving over Commonwealth Ave bridge, the water that lands on your windscreen is brown and grainy and leaves long smears.
Brisbane winter mornings: low of 12 degrees, sometimes you need to wear a jacket.

Verdict: Do you even need to ask?

With apologies to Our Nation's Capital, life is much sweeter here. Warmer, too.


With thanks to the random guy I borrowed this format off. I'd link to him, but I can't find his blog now.

2 Comments:

Blogger phil said...

moved to bv from cba 10 years ago. don't miss a damned thing...

love the leafy western suburbs!

11:06 PM  
Blogger OTT said...

I got blasted by that jet of water while WALKING across the bridge near Lake Burley Griffin to go to 'floriade' on the other side. I'm from BrisVegas and I froze. Could not appreciate the flowers very much. It was September. September! (3 years ago and I'm still indignant).

4:20 PM  

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